Japanse New-Girl Monkey Network
Yeah, I Know, it's 03/03/03
I'm far from a religious expert (and have no affiliation with the Anglican church), but using my common sense and instinct, Dr Rowan Williams seems like the kind of guy whose blog I'd like to read (if he had one). Last night on ABC was a show on the newly appointed archbishop and he is a genuine delight to listen to. A lot of his views are controversial, but he delivers them with careful thought, eloquence, and humility. Something he said during an Easter vigil really strikes me-- it was something like, "Resurrection is about reconnecting with reality."
What I am looking for right now, deep down, is this kind of resurrection. Watching the program, I was overwhelmed by a need to build up my spiritual life. It's hard going from a comfortable, familiar religious community to an entirely new place, an entirely different country, and have to reforge those community connections; maybe even harder in a spiritual sense than just an ordinary social sense because of the intensely personal nature of the subject. I don't really have anyone here that I trust to say, "This is a church or a place of worship that will resonate with you and be safe for you."
On the one hand, just being here is a(n intentional) step toward that feeling of rebirth. It's a step away from a rut, a stifled, rigid direction that I felt my life was taking. However, I sort of foolishly wished that that would be enough, even though logically I knew better. Now it's becoming more and more unavoidable that there are many more steps ahead, and now that I'm here, I'm not sure which direction to go or how. In some ways, I really miss the church I attended in Bellingham, and I think it was one of the best things about my life there. I've been attending United Methodist churches since I was 11 years old, and the one on Garden St is a particularly good one, with a pastor and a community that I like. However, the United Methodist Church doesn't exist here (although there is the Wesleyan Methodist and the Uniting Church), so I'm freed of the comfort of my default choice. I have to stretch myself, personally, spiritually, and socially, and I've been studiously avoiding that challenge so far. Meanwhile, things will get more and more uncomfortable until I've found the situation I need and really begin to grow again.
{ link me }